For the Love of a Good Garden of Friends

Today I just heard of a great friend's passing.

He did not start out as a friend.

I will call him B. Just that. B.

We began as next door neighbors that could barely stand the sight of each other, until we learned the other's name and then we could barely stand the mention of the name...You get the point. I have always regretted that time and so did  he. It is in the past and we mended things up really well.

So well we - his family and mine- became really close friends.

And the REAL mending came  from a small scared boy and a scraggly garden.

The boy was B's soon to be step son that had seen some really rough things in his very young life.

And my scraggly garden was an attempt at sanity in a way too crazy world that my life had become.

I will call the boy E. Just that. E.

B took E's mom and her two small children in and loved them with all he had. He changed their world. He made horrible things not so horrible, and then not so bad, and then just down right great. I did not know this then.

E. apparently got a new bike for his birthday and thought he could ride it better than he actually could. Of course while I was out front tending to my hostas at dusk he wiped out on the rock strewn sidewalk just a foot from where I stood. Blood covered his shirt and legs. His hands looked like ground hamburger. He was in shock and then when I gently touched his shoulder and made to help him up it took him a minute to register who was touching him. He looked up and a mask of horror and abject fear came over him.

I instantly knew what was happening.

He had been told that I was a bad lady and he needed to stay far far away from our house.

I knew that he needed me to NOT touch him. I knew he needed to hear a soft loving voice as though I were his mom, not the hateful lady next door that just may eat him.

He caught his breath and stood up backing away from me. I looked him in the eye, smiled, and sat down in the dirt and gravel in the alley. I asked him if he was OK.

I let him tower over me and have the upper hand.

I told him he had a neat bike and he rode it really brave like a dare devil.

He smiled in spite of himself for a second, just a second, and then tore down the sidewalk back to his front porch.

I did not even get mad at his parents. All I knew was that together his family and mine had created an atmosphere where he did not feel safe as long as he saw ANYONE outside our house. I cried for him. Not me, him. I did not ever want a child to live in fear because of me.

My daughter was not even a year old and I did not want these children living in fear and our neighbors having to walk on egg shells around BOTH families.

But, I hadn't a clue what to do.

As these things always are it was very complicated. So many folks were mad at so many others. We had even had to go to court and town counsel meetings to oppose each other with complaints.

It was messy.

And as I found out it had been messy for his family and my husband's family many years ago when they had lived next door to each other back in the 1960's.

sigh.... I had a lot of cards stacked against me.

It was early spring when E. wrecked his bike. Along about the second week of summer vacation from school I found E. in my back yard one afternoon as my daughter napped.

He was standing there looking at my daughter's out side toys and my gardening tools.

I had made a maze-like pathway through my garden that year, trying new techniques and old time ways. At the end closest to his back yard my garden had two pole bean tee pees. I had built them from fallen branches and jute twine. Right then the last of the early peas had still clung to the poles and made a slight screen.

I knew that when the beans would grow my daughter and I would have a secret garden in which to read books and play in the shade.

E. grabbed something off the vine, shoved it in his mouth and ran behind their garage. I moved closer and could hear him gagging on what he had picked. He did not see me, but stayed behind the garage. He did not like the dried up pea pod he had stuffed into his mouth.

Without thinking I went to his front porch and knocked on the front door. No one answered. I thought as much. I just wanted to let his mother know he had tried one of the dried peas and he should be OK. I did not use any pesticides because my daughter tried to eat everything she could too.

I also wanted her to know if he wanted to use the football and toss it around or the frisbee or the basketball hoop that was fine. I just did not want kids in the yard when I wasn't home because I wanted to make sure they were safe.

Later that week E. was back. This time he wanted to play with my daughter. She was learning to walk and he wanted to hold her hands and walk the path through my garden. I sat in the weeds I was pulling and said Sure.

For the first time I had seen this little guy he had a real smile on his face. He enjoyed and loved something. I thanked God. Somehow, I knew E. needed this time and so did I.

Every day afterward E. came over when we were outside.

After about two weeks of this his mother came looking for him one evening after dinner.

I will call her T. Just that. T.

She was yelling his name and looking frantic. I came over running to her and told her he was in the bean tee pee reading to my daughter.

I told her I hoped he was not in trouble, but I had asked him if he had permission to be over here. He had said yes.

T said yes, it was fine. She was afraid he had gone down to the river to fish with his little pole after she had told him not to. She was just happy to see him safe.

I invited her to come see.

My garden was NOT a great landscaping feat of French designers. It was just what I thought Peter Rabbit would have grazed in, driving Mr. McGregor mad.

T. sat down hard in the grass and spread her hands throughout. She started crying. Small tears that just slid down her face.

"It is so beautiful," she said.

"My Mom has a garden that is even better than THIS! She can grow ANYTHING!" E. bragged on his mom.

She smiled and wiped her eyes and said "HAD. I HAD a garden like this once."

From there we started sharing our stories of our gardens, our lives, our struggles.

After that E. brought his sister too.

I will call her D. Just that. D.

She was older and wanted to appear above all this mundane stuff.

But soon she was reading books in the bean tee pee too.

Other kids came into the yard one by one more and more every day.

My garden was somewhat a joke to the old Rush County farmers.

Until the drought and my garden did just fine although I rarely watered it.

THEN they started asking me questions. How? Why? When? All the important things.

Then all the kids wanted to have a contest. Who could grow the most? Then the dads wanted to have a contest. Who could grow the hottest peppers? Then the moms wanted to have a contest. Who could preserve the most?

We realized we had become a nice little community out at the cross roads in the middle of a bunch of corn fields.

Then we all became friends.

Then we wanted to help others.

And then we did.

That was how B. had put it one day when I asked him how he could stand this one guy that just used him and used him over and over. "Well, we just shared things til we were friends and we just ARE."

A great many people have lost a good friend today.

God bless B. and T. and D. and E.

-Suzanna

OWNERSHIP

I have to address something here.

I mention my daughter's fondness for fashion very often. It really is her passion. She has been drawn to fabrics, colors, accessories, and purses, shoes, hats, etc since she first crawled across the baby blanket spread in the living room floor six years ago.

There is something very important about bringing up a child in the way he should go. This means recognizing his affinities. His passions. This means holding on to reason, but showing the child how he or she can turn their passion into a way of life.

My son is almost 24 years old now. From the moment I took him to the last drive-in in the Denver area when he was about 4 months old (to see Batman!) we saw that this kid was OBSESSED with media.

Now remember, back in 1989 media was not all encompassing as it is today.

That four month old not only stayed awake for the entire movie but was GLUED to it. He responded at the appropriate moments with appropriate responses! It was evident that he KNEW what was going on - SCARY!

I realized I had to monitor things for my child in a very real way.

His affinity was for art in media. AND BATMAN. It is my fault, if it is a fault of his. I assume responsibility for that introduction. BUT I do not claim any applause for his successful art career he has now. THAT is all HIS doing. HE is the one that put in literally THOUSANDS of hours at the table with pencil and paper in front of him with only his imagination separating them. And for all the countless other endeavors to get his art, himself, out there in meaningful ways to him.

I DO take responsibility for NOT allowing that to become a trivial part of his life. I DO take responsibility for standing up for him when others were saying "Hey son, this art stuff is nice and all - but you need to get a business degree." or what ever was uttered with good intentions.

How did I know my son did not need a business degree? I home schooled him. While I owned and ran a business. He was with me every day and learned how a business was ran and how it was developed into something bigger. He saw it took EVERY FREAKING HOUR OF EVERY DAY - if you let it. He saw that if you did not like what you were doing it did not matter how much you made - you could still be miserable. He saw how creativity drove a business from being one that just squeaked on by to one that made some real money and provided REAL services as the customers needed it to. He saw that changing operations when the customer base demanded it was essential to staying alive in the market place. He also saw what professional business meetings were like and what clothing you wore to such events in life. He saw paperwork and tax filings and accountants and .....

He had a business degree of sorts by the time he was 10 years old.  He also had a lawn mowing business by then. When he was a teenager he cleaned gutters, odd jobs and held down the obligatory fast food service and movie theater jobs. Most importantly he learned what he did NOT EVER want to do again! Cleaning the bathrooms at a neighborhood bar and grill was the BEST motivating factor for my son to stay on his path. He knew he did not still want to be there cleaning bathrooms at age 30 with two child support payments and no skills, no life. He gradually began to realize that he wanted not to be in management, he wanted to be in OWNERSHIP. THAT he learned from me. OWN your life.

When my 6 year old daughter stands before me and says "How do I look?" in one of the 378 outfits she has assembled that afternoon I know that I am helping her develop her future career. She has been learning how to copy and make patterns, how to sew, and how to examine materials. She gathers bits and pieces of junk around the house and designs jewelry. Making decorations for the holidays all throughout the year is a serious undertaking for her. AND  she wants to share this activity with the entire family.

So I know family is important to her too.

She loves to cook and how to preserve and dry foods. She loves to design and plan our gardens. She loves to plant those gardens with vegetables and flowers. She loves to cut those flowers and design flower arrangements with the intent to GIVE THEM AWAY.

Somewhere in all of this she is developing a sense of who she is. Of who she WILL be. I am excited.
I am excited that I get to see all this unfold for both of my children.

This is the essence of making life better. Making life REAL.

Make life YOURS.

Own it.

-Suzanna

BOOK REVIEW

On my Facebook page I made a list of book I was reading in regards to homesteading/self reliance/skills learning. Here is that list:

Greenhouse Gardening by Miranda Smith
Carrots Love tomatoes by Louise Riotte
The Encyclopedia of Gardening by Deena Beverly and Barty Phillips
Buildings for Small Acreages by James S. Boyd
The Woodlot Management Handbook by Stewart Hilts and Peter Mitchell
The Home & Farm Manual Classic Edition by Jonathan Periam
(this last one is a reprint from the 1884 edition - so much to be learned in this hunk of paper!)

Today I will give my two cents worth on Buildings for Small Acreages.

This particular version is a revision by Carl L. Reynolds in 1996 of James S. Boyd's original 1978 work. (Most source information provided within its pages that has changed is available on the internet.) 

As I have always been drawn in by architecture, blueprints and building plans of any sort this book appealed to me visually first of all. It was originally included in my library tote as eye candy! When I took a closer look, though I found that these were expertly drafted plans, many with materials lists included.  I really liked  the inclusion of the Title Blocks. (Here is a link for blueprint terminology and reading basics.)

Many times when I have hunted for informal builidng plans in the libraries I frequent there are just some simple diagrams and crude blue prints. The Title Blocks in this instruction manual really give you some added insight to how useful these are. 

Some of the plans are from the 1940's when there was a push to bring farming and rural living into a more organized business structure. 

Some of those efforts were good, and some were not so much. But that is for another post. 

Many universities and U.S. Dept of Agriculture programs were used to research planning and design books for the most useful and well used plans and projects at the time.  Most of these building, structures and gadgets I have seen all over the United States as I have driven on my numerous cross country trips through the rural landscapes. I have seen many of these projects in use and attest to their qualities. 

In the appendices are listed plans and ordering information from the U.S. Dept. of Ag. and The American Plywood Association. 

Also listed is the State Cooperative Extension Services Offices that provide plans.  Now, THAT is helpful! 

Growing up in Indiana of course Purdue Extension and Ball Canning Company were all I thought existed until at the age of 19 I moved to Colorado! 

Even if you have no intention of EVER constructing more than a discarded pile of garbage in the compost heap outside you will find something interesting in this book. It has that quality of inspiring other ideas. I like that. Not only are there plans for barns, gates, homes and cottages, but there are plans for tennis tables, how to set up regulation horseshoe pits, croquet courts, diving rafts, boat docks, how to make forms for poured concrete projects, etc. 

Now, I borrowed this particular book from the Cambridge City Public Library in Western Wayne County. They are part of the Evergreen Interlibrary Loan System so you can order this through any library that participates in that. There are also other area libraries that have cooperative lending policies with CCPL and others too. Check with you local librarian to see if your branch has a copy or if it can be ordered for you to borrow. 

Of course, I found it on Amazon.com and it can be purchased for under $10 + shipping if you would like to add it to your collection. Although I would not recommend reading this book on an electronic reader, there is an option on Amazon to request that it be made available in that format too. 

For any book I suggest using your local public library first to see how you really like it. 

This book I personally will not be purchasing  because it provided plenty of information on how to get these possibly free or a low cost. I am a tight wad so that is how I roll! But I can see how someone would love to add this to their workshop collection. 

I think the next book I will review here will be The Woodlot Management Handbook by Hilts and Mitchell.

Please comment on this review.

-Suzanna

Hhhmmm...Where to begin?

Squirrely Acres is not ACTUALLY a farm YET.

It is more a way of thinking right now.

It is a way of preparing (no NOT doomsday prepping, sorry folks) for what ever may come our way. It is about learning skills and gaining knowledge. Having wisdom to make the best decisions we can, making plans and being able to carry them out.

We want to have freedom. This world is changing all the time and freedom means one thing at one point in life and means something quite different for another time in life. It also means different things to different people.

Here at Squirrely Acres we want to not be tied to a mortgage, car payment, student loans, careers that are more damaging than edifying (and not really providing that much anyway), and stagnant and unhealthy lifestyles.

Each step that gets us closer to that is a good step.

That being said - the most important thing to us is loving and honoring God and our family and friends.

This is not a religious cult or a back to the woods ministry. (Now THAT would be squirrely.)

I just want all to be clear that we are Christian, but will not be throwing the Bible in anyone's faces.

This is more about creating community.

This is about helping ourselves, our friends and family, and anyone else that wants to, learn how to make life better by our improved choices. You decide what you want to improve. I won't tell you what you need to do - THAT is YOUR decision.

Here are some of the things you will most likely see and read about here:

Frugality
Gardening
Hunting
Animal Husbandry
Preserving/Storing/ Preparing Food
Foraging
DIY
Learning New Skills
Sharing Skills Mastered
Bartering
Food Sources
Farming Lifestyles
Urban Farming
Self Sufficiency
Brewing
Bee Keeping
Home Construction
Woodworking
Metal Working
Homeschooling
Online Learning
Community Resources
Social Responsibility
Free Resources in Urban Settings
Cultural Opportunities
Career Opportunities
and many more things I am sure.

I list these items so that if any of this is just not your thing - you will be forewarned.

Do not come to our little party and listen to what we are talking about and learning about and say that you are offended. Go away and make your own little party. It is just that simple.

Please feel free to comment and share ideas, events, links, whatever you can think of that will help someone else find a way to reach a better life - or just something fun to try. We are pretty open to things.

-Suzanna

Squirrely Me

Just to prove how aptly named this blog is:

I just realized that I have spelled SQUIRRELY  about five different ways in the last few days so if you are just finding me here -

WELCOME!

I am just finding it too! Thank you to a little birdie that clued this clueless squirrel in.

http://gemma-correll.blogspot.com/2011/11/party-season.html

(Just so you know... I provide links to art and ideas ^^^^^^ within my posts. This gives credit where credit is due, as well as provides you with other sites to distract you and occupy your time. BECAUSE we all know there is just not enough on the internet to spend time doing these days....)

Now that the address, name and serial number issue is solved and Private Squirrel is reporting for duty we can get on with this mess!

-Suzanna

Getting My Act Together

Over the years one of the most important things in starting a new endeavor is to get my ducks in a row, get my act together, blow out the cobwebs, organize and then charge forth! WITH a cuppa coffee.....

With that being said, I am going to grab a cuppa, do some cleaning around the house today, and finish another thing on my lazy ragamuffin to do list - THEN I will commit my first official act of posting here at Squirrely Acres!

Sooooo.....get your questions ready, write down your ideas, comments, criticisms, whatever and let's start seeing what we can come up with.

A young Suzanna circa 1972 already head strong and determined to do things her way!

-Suzanna